UGH! Just read what I consider an appalling description about how this technique is a good one for marketing services and products in general and how it can be used in coaching practices. While I understand what the person meant and how it would apply, it made me a little sick to my stomach. Basically, this line of thinking in the minds of many who teach marketing for coaching services is, ” Give them a taste of the good stuff and they will get hooked and come back for more.”
I don’t want anyone hooked on working with me. I want clients who are serious about improving their lives and about realizing their biggest dreams. My ideal client is someone who has struggled with loss, who is going through a life stage change, or who wants to discover how life can become not only tolerable, but joyful and of true value. I want to work with authentic, real, decent people who want the same in me. I don’t want to work with those who crave a taste of something addictive that will feel good for a short time, so they can pretend their problems will be solved with little or no effort on their parts. My ideal client is one who needs help tapping into his or her own inner resources, but is not someone who keeps looking to the outside for solutions, or is somehow who may have looked outside of herself in the past, but is ready to change that.
I have no issue with giving trial or complimentary sessions so that the clients and I can determine if we are compatible. That seems only fair, in an arena where the interactions and relationships can, at times, grow very intense. Trust building is crucial and though this takes time, I encourage prospective clients to use their intuition to decide if it feels like this potential is there with me. I guess I just object to gimmicky give-aways and cotton-candy fluff that in some respects, insult the intelligence and good judgment of would-be clients.
I also heard one marketing guru say that in the end it really doesn’t much matter what we have up our sleeves to help clients or how we propose to solve their problems, but it is all about how we can get to the level of earning six or seven figures, so marketing is really more crucial and important than what we actually do for our clients. This one really made me shudder.
It is not that I am closed off to marketing ideas or to making money, but I guess I still come from the camp of purists and a long history of altruisim. That is why I founded and directed a non-profit agency for 28 plus years that focused on building and supporting families and on creating long term relationships with clients. A desire to help people live more satisfying and successful lives is what motivated me to become a life-stage transitions coach dealing with loss, change and self-discovery. I truly believe that I am here to serve a higher purpose. It may sound naive or smarmy to those whose main focus is feathering their own financial nests. I don’t want to sell products that are made of glitter and spun sugar. I don’t want to sell hype to people who wake up to find the high of the night before is gone, wallets empty and that their problems are still weighing them down and dreams are still unrealized.
I definitely don’t want to feel I am selling a product that I need to talk people into buying. My product will probably never be wrapped in glamour, showcased with smoke and mirrors or equpped with the bells and whistles of the marketing glitterati set. That’s just not who I am. I am “selling” myself as a coach. I am selling a person who has been through the wringer a few times in life, who has moved through many painful and joyous transitions of my own and who has, for the most part, emerged with a lot of learning and some wisdom, though maybe not unscathed. I am selling my listening skills, my insights, intuition, sincerity, honesty, compassion and my creativity. I am peddling my ability to be gentle and tough simultaneously. I sell my heartfelt commitment to the client’s agenda and success.
I have head the analogy of a small plastic tasting spoon in an ice cream store, where clients/customers can sample flavors before they buy them. I have heard that this free sampling and product giveaway is the basis of what is called the “generosity-based business model”, where customers or clients are given a taste of the wares on sale in order to earn their trust and so that we can “hook them in” and later sell them something of value. I think it is hard to offer samples of what I want to provide in a tiny spoon, or to package these qualities in a free goody bag. I am not saying I will not periodically make worthwhile gifts or bonus offers when I am moved to do so, but my perspective clients will need to search beneath the designer gift wrap if they want to see the value I offer. My qualities and services might better be described as wrapped in practical, no-nonsense brown craft paper. If I am in the mood I might decorate the paper with colorful drawings or lines of poetry, but it is really the clients’ creativity I am seeking to draw out and nurture and not a way to showcase mine for the purpose of making a sale.
I know I don’t like to be sold or talked into things and never have. I dislike the assumption that I need to do that in order to fill up my coaching practice. I know I have the ability to help people recognize that holds them back and to help them transform fear or pain into something worthwhile and productive.
So what about you? What is the way you determine who is real and ready to help you, or who is primarily a salesperson in the carefully constructed clothing of a helping professional?
Mike says
As you know, I’m neither a coach or client, but simply an old friend. If we live by the Serenity Prayer, (and when I went to school, we still said the pledge of allegience, and prayed for our fellow Americans) “God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and the wisdom to know the difference. If we do this, and let the warmth of our inner self shine through. Coach or client. Most people today, can separate the wheat from the chaff. I know I can. God bless, Mike.
Iris Arenson-Fuller says
Mike, you have always been one of the most real people I know.
“If we do this, and let the warmth of our inner self shine through. Coach or client. Most people today, can separate the wheat from the chaff. I know I can”. I know you can, as well and I appreciate this.
Bob Vance says
This is a great piece Iris. From the beginning of my training at ICA I recognized where I would diverge from the marketing perspective of many of the coaches and trainers there. There’s a ring of falseness in that terrible word “positivity” that infects the nature of the work a coach can do, and who he or she can engage with. I want a small practice, working with people for whom the investment in my services is substantial and proportional to what they are able to give… and I am not just talking about money. I find the transparent nature of the husksterism present in the worst of motivational personality cult coaching offensive and shallow and am not interested in being associated with it, nor do I wish to work with people who would be seduced by it.
Iris Arenson-Fuller says
I know, Bob, that you and I agree on this topic and we have had many conversations around the issue of staying authentic and reaching the kinds of clients we truly want to work with. You have said it so well here.
Another friend used the word husksterism in a direct mail to me and I am sad to say that I think it does apply to some in the field. It’s just not where you and I are, so the question is how do we reach the people we want and we know we can help without falling prey to these tactics but still getting the word out there?
Jeremie says
Iris,
I appreciate your perspective and I think it is important for each of us to approach how we grow our coaching business in a way that is true to who we are as a person.
I would like to offer a bit of a different perspective on the concept of “the pink spoon” by shifting the language around it.
I don’t think a pink spoon is necessarily meant to “hook a client on our services” or make them dependent for more. I think that a pink spoon can be something that is valuable and shows a potential client our style, philosophy, and personality. It isn’t so much about hooking them as it is allowing them to explore whether or not there is a “fit”.
The “pink spoon” I plan on offering my clients is a complete guide to the first stages and exercises I do with my clients. The exercises they complete, I think, will be of value to them whether or not they ever work with me personally. This will also allow them to see if how I work will fit with how they work.
So, in my case I am not trying to hook them on anything. I am offering a real part of my coaching practice for free in the hopes they will join my newsletter so I can offer them truly valuable information. I am also hoping they return to my blog and read my posts and we can build a relationship that way.
I think a pink spoon can be a valuable way of connecting with clients. Similar to the goals exercise you have on your site from, I think, Solution Box. By carrying out that free activity a person gets a report on their goals, but they also get signed up for Solution Box’s newsletter, and get follow up emails from Solution Box.
That is a pink spoon with value, not an attempt to hook anyone on anything.
Maybe the point is that we need to look at the intention of the offer. If it seems cheesy and meant to hook us it is selling, if it is an authentic attempt to provide value and make a possible connection then it is engagement.
A very thought provoking post considering I am basing my business model on this concept, so I thank you for writing it.
Jeremie
Iris Arenson-Fuller says
Jeremie,
You have taken a lot of time to grace this space with your thoughts. You have my gratitude for doing so. I understand about the pink spoon as you present it but I have also heard it put out from a different standpoint. I always value your perspectives and have enjoyed every single thing I have read of yours.
Thank you, as well!
Ruth Deming says
the best introduction to you as a coach is to read your blog. it tells a lot about who you are as a person and your values. obviously you are not a piece of fluff (what a description) but are a caring compassionate and passionate woman with a family, a business, and interests. these should appeal to prospective clients who consciously or unconsciously, see you as a role model.
transparency is important. i do the same thing in my blogposts tho i can advertise all i want and i rarely get new clients. i’ve given up trying to figure out how to get more. maybe i should hire you as my coach.
Iris Arenson-Fuller says
Ruth, once again you have honored me with your comment and I thank you for your compliments. These words, coming from one who is a totally transparent (though highly complex) and real and honest person, feel wonderful.
You know how much I think of your professional calling and work, your writing and your views on the world.
Mindy Mc says
I love your take on this Iris. I agree with you and feel that you are smart to stay true to who you are and what you value. I also think that most prospective clients know when they are being manipulated in that way. If you are good at what you do and have strong ethics you will not need any hocus pocus to be successful. I believe that giving a free consult is good practice and I always try to spend time on the phone with new clients before booking an appointment in order to be sure it is a good fit all around. This is not to “give them a taste” so they will come back for more, but rather to get a feel for who they are, what their situation is and whether or not I think I can be helpful. It also starts the process of building trust and rapport. I try to remember that these “marketing experts” are just trying to make their own money and don’t necessarily care at all about your practice and whether you are successful. In terms of marketing strategies that I think are valuable, I think that a professional looking website that reflects your personal style and outlines your philosophy is a must along with hooking up with a good search engine so that when someone googles coaching, you pop up.early in the search.
Iris Arenson-Fuller says
Mindy,
I so appreciate your taking the time to write this comment and I love hearing your thoughts and perspective. Thank you!