This content has been archived. It may no longer be relevant
I keep hearing this expression referring to way too many things. . “Ending up with kids who are happy and healthy is a crapshoot, no matter how hard we try to raise them right nowadays”. ” Finding someone in this day and age, with whom you can have a good relationship is a crapshoot”. “Finding a good doctor is a crapshoot”. “Choosing a political leader is a crapshoot. They are all bad anyway.” “Treating people with the right medications for depression is a crapshoot”. “Trying to succeed in a business is a crapshoot”. So if that is the case, are people supposed to give up and let the dice roll wherever they will? Are we supposed to just do and accept what we are told, or not try very hard to better our situations, or even to follow our moral compasses?
I do know that as soon as I reached a point in my life when I no longer expected to be in control of everything, I became a happier, healthier person. That doesn’t mean I don’t ever try to understand why boulders seem to be hurled in my path at times. It doesn’t mean that I don’t try to find deeper meaning in the mundane. I am certainly no female incarnation of Job from the Old Testament, with boundless faith no matter what. I question a lot, but I accept a lot more than I ever did when I was younger
Even though I know there is so much that I don’t control, I don’t believe that life is merely a crapshoot. In spite of our powerlessness over so much, we do have the ability to make choices every day, about what we do, with whom we associate, what we ignore and what we make commitments to change. I have witnessed miracles that defied explanation. I have witnessed many “coincidences” that required so many layers of events and people to fall into an exact spot in order to happen, that it didn’t even seem possible, but was. I have witnessed evil and amazing goodness. I have observed people at their worst, and people at their best. I am sure others have seen me at my worst, and also at my best.
What do you believe about choices, about luck, about chance? Do you think life, for the most part, is just a crapshoot? Do you feel that it doesn’t really matter what you do? Do you feel that holding this belief releases you from certain responsibilities? If it does, maybe it also prevents you from experiencing amazement when things turn out well, or from studying and learning about ways to do things better. Maybe it removes the strength and comfort of being hopeful and prayerful. Maybe it keeps you from taking risks.
What have you let go of in your life that helped you relax and be a more productive person once you did let go of it?
What did you decide to take control over by making certain choices, even if you were unsure of the potential outcomes?
I love something Carl Sagan said in Pale Blue Dot: A Vision of the Human Future in Space. “…A religion, old or new, that stressed the magnificence of the Universe as revealed by modern science might be able to draw forth reserves of reverence and awe hardly tapped by the conventional faiths…”
It seems to me that if we wake up each day and are afraid or defeated because we don’t know which way the dice will roll, we lose our awe of all the unexplained, complex, miraculous and wondrous things that are possibilities for our future, no matter what kind of pain we have suffered through in the past.
“The Earth is a very small stage in a vast cosmic arena”, Carl Sagan also said. I think this is true and that in the whole scheme of things I am but a small speck of matter. I do matter, though, and so do you.
Your comments are always sought and appreciated.
Iris J. Arenson-Fuller, PCC is an ICF credentialed Life and Loss Transformation/Life Reinvention Coach, Poet/Author, Mom, Grandmother and Scottish Terrier lover.
Iris helps people recover & rebuild life after loss, (all kinds), or just because it’s time for change. She helps them reinvent themselves and be creative survivors. She loves working with widows because she has walked in their shoes. She most often helps women in mid-life or older but sometimes men, too, with all types of grief and loss related topics.
Check out more articles on her blog and info on her website at
www.visionppoweredcoaching.com
and
