Yes, I am a Grief Coach. Some people think of me as their “Grief Guide”. If you have explored this site a bit, you have seen that one of my specialties is grief and loss and that there are all types of losses. As it says in my special report that you may have already received, loss is not just about death.
Grief is one of my areas of expertise. I didn’t exactly wake up one day and decide to be a Grief Coach. I didn’t choose to be so expert at grief and loss. It chose me. I surely would not have chosen to go through all that I did in the past. Yet I know that the knowledge, compassion and learning that are the results of my past trials, are truly gifts.
Such gifts are not to be taken lightly. If you believe, as I do, that we are here on this earth for a reason, or even for multiple reasons, then you will understand why I had to work with those who have lost loved ones, or have experienced other types of terrible losses. When I took my training and established Vision Powered Coaching, it felt like my destiny to help others as a Grief Coach and to impart some of what I have learned. It’s a joy to help people transform their lives after loss. It’s a joy to be able to help them through and beyond their grief.
As a Grief Coach, I will help you connect with the very best parts of your old self. I will work with you to build new strengths and tools, in order to redesign your life. I won’t lead you in the direction I think you should go. We will work together to reach your own goals and the ways of being and doing that feel right to you. While your loss, sadness and memories will always be a part of who you are, you can learn how to once again feel good about life and how to create a worthwhile one for yourself, and for your family.
Grief coaching, when you are ready to feel better and to move forward with life, is a way of helping you grow into your new normal and new reality. It is not a way of pushing your pain aside, because that will only hurt you eventually. It’s a way of using your pain to expand and improve the person you are. You will learn to embrace the truth that you are entitled to go on with life. You will still be able to honor your past and the people or things you have lost.
Some of you who have lost a loved one, or who have suffered another type of traumatic loss, such as having a serious illness, or having to watch a close loved one deteriorate from an illness or a condition like Alzheimer’s, feel that life will never be OK again. You may have a hard time believing you can ever feel better, or have a decent and happy future.
The feelings and behaviors that may occur after a serious trauma or loss may feel a little “crazy” to people you know. They may even feel that way to you, at times. You may be on an emotional roller coaster and may not understand your own feelings or moodswings. Still a lot of this is “normal”, though there is not just one form of “normal” when it comes to grief. The beliefs about the stages of grief that were popularized a few decades ago, have now come into question. Research has taught us that feelings tend to be all over the place at different times during the grief process, but especially at first. Some of the things experienced during periods of deep grief are things that most people feel, but other responses are unique to you, because you don’t live in a textbook. You are a unique person.
You may have even seen a grief counselor or therapist to help you. That’s great if it works, or has worked for you in the past. Sometimes it does, and sometimes it doesn’t. Sometimes there are co-existing diagnoses or conditions that make a mental health professional exactly the right choice for you. Getting help takes courage and is usually a very good thing.
However, a Grief Coach operates a little differently than a counselor or therapist. Grief is not a mental illness. Therapists and counselors are generally trained to dig way back into the past. They may even go back to your childhood to explore why you think, feel and act as you do. A grief coach may help you examine some of those things, but will more often help you stay focused on the present and on the future. The grief coach will become your partner to help you create plans to to get you to whatever goals or ways of being you want for yourself. The coach will help you come up with practical ideas, solutions and actions.
I use a variety of tools and techniques to help my clients. One of them is writing, when a client is open to that. Find out a bit about that here. http://visionpoweredcoaching.com/writing-for-healing-and-growth/
Why not schedule a call to chat with me soon, to see how grief coaching works and if it’s right for you? I work with clients via phone and Skype so location is not important. Everything we discuss in our sessions is completely confidential.
Contact me to set up a time to talk. email@example.com
Here are a few of the things said about me by some clients for whom I have been a Grief Coach:
“I could not believe in myself without you. I jumped at your invitation to help me! I don’t want to live miserable and feel like a failure everyday. You have helped ME find ME, find my courage, my strength & my will power to go on every day, after widowhood and facing other struggles. Just teaching me to only cry at a certain time and then end it and make it be over for that day..just that tool alone is priceless!! Very thankful for you. I feel blessed to know you. And firmly believe it was Divine Intervention that put you in my path. “-Samantha K.-Cedar Bluff, VA
“I began working with Iris when I was struggling through new widowhood and feeling life would never be ok for me again. I worked with Iris for over 6 months. She helped me not only with my grief and with the insecurities I felt as a widow, but helped me to look at my past in relation to why I make the choices I often make. Iris worked with me on recognizing my inner strengths and building confidence in my own abilities…”-Diane R.,-New Jersey
“Divorce stinks! I thought it was what I wanted and needed when the marriage was falling apart. I thought that my life would miraculously fall into place as soon as it was final. Boy, that didn’t happen. I felt lost, like a failure and plenty scared. Iris quickly helped me recognize my grief. She gave me some tools to begin to deal with it. I had lost my sense of self too. She helped me find what I was made of that was good, and that was still working. We kind of rebuilt me together. It was like rehab, one step at a time. as I re-learned how to be me. Soon I was having fun and looking forward to our sessions. My kids noticed a big difference in my moods after only three sessions with Iris. I I have seen some huge great changes in how I deal with things. I stay on task and don’t give up right away now. I relate to people much , much better than ever before.”-Lisa T. -Connecticut
“Those who have suffered understand suffering and therefore extend their hand.” – Patti Smith
“What we have once enjoyed deeply we can never lose. All that we love deeply becomes a part of us.” – Helen Keller